The Register Forum

Anonymous Advice with Alma (and Lucy…)

Anonymous Advice with Alma (and Lucy…)

June 4, 2019

My friend is so funny ... but she’s TOO quiet. I can never hear her I don’t like saying “what” all the time ... it’s so awkward! Lmk

Anonymous Advice with Alma (and Lucy): April Showers

Anonymous Advice with Alma (and Lucy): April Showers

May 1, 2019

Editor’s Note: This new advice column responds to real, anonymous student questions. The answers are satirical and should not be taken seriously.

Where Art Thine AirPods?

Cecilia Barron, Editor-in-Chief

February 10, 2019

On Christmas morn they run, down the stairs they go, Their gallops like reindeers, they quickly peered For objects as white as the winter snow So Kanye could be wirelessly hear’d.

Humorous Haikus

William Reed and Stella Engel-Werman

November 30, 2018

It is freezing out, This is a winter haiku, Toilet seat is cold

November Word Search

November Word Search

November 29, 2018

William Reed...

Four to Five Falcons

Cecilia Barron, Editor-in-Chief

September 27, 2018

This past year, great questions have entered the national dialogue that challenge this nation: Who is an American? What is America? How is this nation changing? Why is the rating system in the Register Forum reviews out of four Falcons rather than five? Is America a true democracy?

Opposing Viewpoints, Meaningless Issues: Vest or Cummerbund?

Opposing Viewpoints, Meaningless Issues: Vest or Cummerbund?

May 30, 2018

The Argument for Vests by Freddie Gould It’s that time of year again: Us beautiful men must go out and acquire the formalwear to wow everyone during p...

“Spoon Game”

May 30, 2018

Sometimes throughout our lives, we take a critical hit And we wonder if a lifetime of hurting is even worth it Well, let me spell out a tale imbued w...

Opposing Viewpoints, Meaningless Issues

Opposing Viewpoints, Meaningless Issues

January 30, 2018

Chunky Peanut Butter by Ethan Rothenberg Until a couple of months ago, smooth peanut butter was, to me, a relic of a forgotten time—a failed trial ...

Is the Earth Actually Round?

Is the Earth Actually Round?

October 30, 2017

In 1492, Christopher Columbus ran into North America while trying to sail across the Atlantic in search of India. Consequently, he allegedly discovered that th...

Advice to the Class of 2018

Sophie Harrington, Contributing Writer

October 30, 2017

Burn as many bridges as you want this year; you can still be friends on Facebook. Challenge yourselves to eat at Angelo’s every day for a month. Apply to at least 35 colleges (obviously all the Ivies). Come naked to school; we don’t have a dress code! Show up to every sporting event just to chant “SENIORS!” Post “Send Point” at least fi...

Fall Headlines

Fall Headlines

September 28, 2017

Mentor Gets Wisdom Teeth Pulled, Is Unable to Give Freshmen Advice

The Student Newspaper of Cambridge Rindge and Latin
Humor Columns