Are you Darwin’s Ltd? Because I miss you every day.

Are you $1 Student Government popcorn? Cause you’re my favorite snack.

Are you the sandwich station? Because you’re in high demand.

Are you a gender-neutral bathroom? Because I would go to great lengths for you.

You couldn’t be Falcon Block because I’d never skip out on you.

Are you sure your class isn’t in the other building? Cause you’re a work of art.

I don’t know what’s hotter—you or the third-floor bridge at noon.

Write me a pass to the Teen Health Center because you made my heart stop.

I’m about to be a community notification with the way I’ll be blowing up your phone.

Are you an AP history class? Because I’d fight to get with you. 

Are you the guest access wifi password? I’ve been looking for you everywhere.

This article also appears in our February 2023 print edition.