1. “The Kingpin of CRLS’s Most Dangerous Trade: Sophomore Goes From Rags to Riches After Selling CRLSGuest-Access Password to Students for $5”

2. “First Period Class in Turmoil After Finding out That Kid That Says, ‘I’m So Tired’ Every Morning Actually Got Twelve Hours of Sleep Last Night”

3. “‘Athlete of the Month: Boy Who Runs Through Harvard Yard Every Morning to Get to Class”

4. “‘Having a Failed Photography Account on Instagram Is Now a Pre-Requisite for Photo 1”

5. “Monday Madness: Tablemate Stirs Up Confusion After Informing You It ‘Feels Like a Thursday’”

This article also appears in our January 2023 print edition.