Dealing With the Loss of the Class of 2022

Julia Shaw and Tavi Pollard

We all love the seniors so much. Now that they’re gone, we’re going to have to cope in our own ways. Though their places will never be truly filled (and they will always be in our hearts), it might be nice to have some time without them. Here’s a list of all the things you can finally do at school now that the Class of ’22 is gone.

1. Start your own spoon game. Are you bored at school now that nobody’s hopping on one foot backwards down the hallway? Us too. Organize a spoon game for underclassmen!
2. Steal their leadership positions! Juniors, we know you need more to write on your college applications, and now is your time to shine. Since seniors are gone, clubs are missing leaders, right? Take those spots!
3. Juniors: you are now entitled to senioritis! Someone in this school’s got to be burnt out; it’s the cycle of life. Why not make it you? Time to fully check out, conk out, and wait to get out.
4. Go out to lunch. Now that a quarter of our school has jumped ship, the Darwin’s line is practically gone. Treat yourself to a sandwich that costs more than minimum wage!
5. There’s no one left in your classes so I guess the only person left to talk to is your teacher! Become besties? I’m sure they’ll love you.
6. Ask someone to next year’s prom. Get a head start over the summer so no one can steal your date. Let’s hope they say yes! See page 13 of last month’s edition for inspiration.
7. Pull a prank! The seniors were too civilized (read: lame) to organize one, so I guess it’s on the underclassmen this year… Definitely do something elaborate and original, like pulling a fire alarm.
We hope that this list has inspired you to make some exciting and senior-like choices in the last month of school. Write to us at [email protected] and [email protected] to let us know how it goes! <3

This piece also appears in our June 2022 print edition.